When depression was present in my life, my heart and body ached... I used meditation to feel for the first time that day. It was an opportunity to invite space for healing.
I was 17 the first time I tried meditation. I had no idea how to “quiet my mind.” I was unaware of the different types of breathing techniques to calm the nervous system and quite frankly, uninterested. During this stage in life, I felt indestructible. Typical teenager, I know. I played soccer competitively and committed to UC Berkeley my junior year of high school for scholarship. I ran track to stay in shape and trained my body to perform at the top level. Until that point, it did. And I took great care of my body. At least I thought I did. I was proud of my athletic abilities and resiliency on the soccer field. However, at 17, two weeks before high school graduation, I became ill. My skin turned yellow, my liver and spleen swelled and I had bruises all over my body. The day after my senior prom my mom rushed me to the ER where I was transported to a nearby pediatric unit by ambulance. I stayed in the unit for the next two weeks while specialists ran tests. Until this point, I’d never been this unwell. Before my release, I was diagnosed with a rare autoimmune disease that weakened my liver, spleen and immune system and left me in need of blood transfusions and high dose of medications.
I left the pediatric unit the day of my high school graduation and received my diploma in a wheelchair. I continued with my plans to play soccer at a Pac-10 University and left for college within the same month. I began practicing with the team as a student athlete and told my body and mind to “buck up.”
From my personal experience with my new illness and the aggressive medications to treat the inflammation, it was only a matter of time before my body and mind would react. My body and mind did the very best it could. But I did not have all the tools necessary to care for my mind and body emotionally, physically or mentally. And I had no idea where to start. I became depressed, anxious, irritable, overwhelmed, fatigued and burnt out.
This is when my research began. I became my own personal guinea pig for healing. It took a lot of time and energy to find small improvements with my well-being. I began to incorporate restorative yoga into my daily routine. Yoga with the right teacher is a wonderful starting point to healing your wellbeing and nervous system. When depression was present in my life, my heart and body ached. Most days, I used meditation to “feel” for the first time that day. It was an opportunity to invite space for healing. Healing and healers come in all forms. I’m also an advocate of sound healing, bodywork, massage, reiki, qigong and other mind-body therapies. Each of these practices is a form of mindfulness.
I'm so excited to be on this journey with you and grateful you clicked on my podcast. Each episode I share is a labor of love.
Namaste (the light in me, acknowledges the light in you).